26 oct 2007

Sadness in my eyes

There's such a deep sadness in my eyes and I don't know why of just don't remember why. Once I saw the stars on them, the moon and the sun too.
Where is my light shine gone? Where the memories? Where the love?
Have my dreams lost its strength? Is my heart just too broken?
Memories from ancient times. All has changed. I'm different now and jet the same.
A long path I've walked. Through mist. Through land. Through time. Different faces. Different hopes.
How much have I changed? How much did remain the same? How much was lost? How much found anew?
And still that sadness. But I have to look closer. On broken dreams and lost hope. On when I had to find the strength to move on when nothing made sence anymore. On nurturing hope again. To be able to believe it's possible to change everything. No mountain is too high to climb if I prepare good enough. No place is too far, no dream impossible.
But it's not places and things that bring this sadness. When those you love are suffering. When they do things you don't know why and you know they will suffer for it later and I cant do anything to help them.
And how could I share my own pain if I don't know what it is? How to cry when tears won't come out? Hot to fix a broken heart when you can't tell the pieces apart anymore? When hope, love, faith are so hard to grasp. No expectations left. Just a path to walk.
But then I date to dream for just a second it burns like the sun and it burns like hell. Hope and despair alike.
Why is it I feel I don't have the strength anymore if I had to live it all over again? Why is it I feel I don't have the strength to start all over again? Why did everything become so complicated?
I need to find the answers again. I need to recover my skill to dream again.